El Guapo in DC

I am El Guapo. The most Guapo man in all of DC. Mucho Amor

Sunday, April 15, 2007

Helmets and Peanut Butter

You know you had too much to drink the night before when you are laying in bed, wishing, just wishing you had an empty bottle by your bed. The thought process, the self-convincing thought process, that it would actually be a really good idea if I could just relieve myself into a bottle to avoid the headache that is sure to come. Last night, bueno, last night was a good night.

I just wish I remembered it…

This morning I walked into a kitchen that showed off why one shouldn’t mix Tecate beer with Johnny Walker Black.

Peanut butter, from what I am sure you know, is (for the most part) a staple item in the American household. I acquired a taste for this brown cream by visiting the homes of friends as a child. In a drunken rampage, it seems that peanut butter becomes one of the main ingredients of my hunger. Of course, there is a Guatemalan twist…

My kitchen is a mess. Just a mess. The extra large, extra chunky container was left open and I found pieces of dried papaya inside the container. It seems that dried papaya, in this Guatemalan household, replaces the American celery used as a dipping utensil. My face cringed when I saw what I was eating, but then I decided to try it. In truth, not bad. Not bad at all.

There were also flour tortillas lying on the counter. Please note that everything that I had seemed to be half eaten. In this instance, I decided that it would be a good idea to have tortilla, chunky peanut butter, honey and pieces of avocado. From the half-eaten state of this feast, I wasn’t sure if I should try it sober. Well, you only live once and I figured that nothing could hurt as badly as my head. Luckily, it was delicious. The tortilla is a genius item that I believe you can combine with anything. Combine avocado and peanut butter and you have what is possibly one of the greatest snacks known to man.

I will not claim to be the first to combine these items as a snack, but will only say that it is damn good. Not fresh flan good, but damn good.

I even thought about eating in a healthy manner yesterday. I found this out by the lonely red pepper left untouched on my counter. I have no idea what my thought process was, but I’m sure that it involved some peanut butter dipping.

Where was Miguel in all of this? When I woke up this afternoon, he was passed out underneath a table wearing a motorcycle helmet and a soccer ball in his arms. He was also wearing both of his socks as gloves because his hands get cold when he sleeps. Why the motorcycle helmet?

Sometimes, I just don’t ask.

Mucho Amor,

El Guapo

16 Comments:

At 5:15 PM, Anonymous Average Jane said...

If it takes Tecate beer and Johnny Walker Black to come up with the GENIUS idea of peanut butter and avacado burritos, then poor me a glass, because I am MISSING OUT!

Seriously. Tonight was supposed to be taco salad night, but I am seriously reconsidering.

 
At 5:26 PM, Anonymous Judith in NYC said...

I should not be laughing so hard. I am too vieja and might bust something.

Hope the headache is gone.

PS--do you use corn or harina tortillas?

 
At 7:47 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Oh, but to have been a fly on the wall... A fly drinking Tecate and JWB, that is!

I have just been enlightened to homemade flan vs. restaurant flan. Why would anyone by anything but homemade? The difference was AMAZING.

And I just love Miguel. Can I keep him as a pet? I have helmets and socks. I also have hand warmers. And can get homemade tamales and flan.

 
At 7:48 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Oops.. that was BUY and it wasn't supposed to be anonymous.

Leonesse

 
At 9:34 PM, Anonymous angela said...

haha damn, man.

i hate peanut butter..:( haha

 
At 8:12 AM, Blogger Kim Ayres said...

I read the title of your blog entry and expected something quite different...

But the tortilla sounds good anyway.

 
At 8:36 AM, Blogger Crankster said...

Fantastic! I wonder what kind of booze was involved in the development of Reeses Peanut Butter Cups.

 
At 9:33 AM, Blogger ADW said...

I personally enjoy the rum, any kind of rum. And then, when the rum is coursing through my veins free and proud, I promptly pass out in the bathroom wearing a red ball gown and holding a pork chop in my hand. Peanut Butter and a Helmet would be fun as well...

 
At 3:01 PM, Anonymous la hembra said...

PB & J tortillas are a staple in this mixed household. I'm don't think I'm ready to sacrifice an avocado to the taste test yet, though.

 
At 3:42 PM, Blogger Helen Skor said...

Best All-American hang over food . . . a Wendy's fries dipped in a frosty. It makes everything better.

 
At 10:37 PM, Anonymous restaurant gal said...

Will you share your recipes with my chef?

 
At 11:37 PM, Blogger Washington Cube said...

The helmet was in case he bangs his head while it is hanging in the toilet.

 
At 10:25 PM, Blogger Fabulously Broke in the City said...

I don't drink, so I can't really sympathize other than your weird food choices.

Sometimes, the strangest tastes are the best. Like guacamole on a juicy burger... or avocado ice cream... or liverwurst on crackers

 
At 7:04 AM, Blogger Mary Witzl said...

Your kitchen is my kitchen -- I was amazed at the similarities.

I come from a family that made peanut butter and mustard sandwiches. My father raised avocados and he would mix them with anything -- peanut butter and avocados work well together and provide fantastic nutrition, too -- all those amino acids, the protein, the good kind of fat, and vitamins. All good stuff for hangovers too.

 
At 8:13 PM, Blogger Leonesse said...

Helen Skor, you are my soul sister.

Wendy's fries MUST be dipped in a frosty. I happened upon this by accident and when trying to convert others to this culinary delight am met with raised eyebrows.

I am so glad for the internet tubes for showing me that... I am not alone.

...feeling at one with the universe and craving a frosty n fries...

 
At 8:15 PM, Blogger Frank said...

Peanut butter and avocado? I have ingested many a drunken snack, but sadly this has not been one of them.

It is not common for me to try my drunken concoctions in a sober state, but think I might have to alter my ways. who knows? pickles might be good dipped in peanut butter...

 

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