Questions in a Dessert
Today I looked up at God and asked him to make sure he knew what he was doing with me. I didn’t say it in a stern voice, but I did say it in a concerned one.
Accept what comes to you each day.
This little piece of paper fell out of my fortune cookie today and it seems fitting after my conversation with God. They say he works in a mysterious ways and my God decided to send me a message in a Chinese dessert. I always figured he’d send me a message in flan or a pupusa, but no. He chose a fortune cookie.
For the last year, I have shared details of my life with you. You have been there for both happy and sad times and tonight is one of those times that I will share with you.
This week mi Linda and I decided to go our separate ways. It is extremely hard for me to write this because I feel like my chest is imploding with each breath I take. I am still trying to comprehend how two people can love each other so much and realize that this may not be the right course. That it may not be the right thing at the right time.
Tonight will mark the first night that I go to bed without her and I fear the darkness that my room will bring me. I have only the sound of raindrops on my roof to keep me company.
Mi Linda is one of the most amazing women I have ever had the pleasure to meet. She has a radiance that attracts people to her and makes them smile. She is a truly genuine person in a sea of knock offs. I believe that I became a better person every minute that I was able to spend with her.
While I realize that some things must happen, I will still look up at the sky to make sure that God knows what he’s doing.
Because I sure as hell don’t.
Mucho Amor,
El Guapo
posted by El Guapo in DC @ 10:10 PM
29 Comments:
damn... if there were anything i could say, i would.
as it is, all i can say is that i feel awfully sorry for you.
I don't usually comment on your blog, though I love reading it...but I just had to say, you have my sympathy.
I was trying to think of something witty and comforting to say.
But, no matter how old you get, or how much you know you will survive the end of a relationship just fine in the long run, and eventually meet someone new who is special to you. Right when this happens, it hurts, and it sucks, and you just feel like you will never feel better again.
So, instead of being witty and comforting, I will just tell you someone you don’t even know cares that you are hurting, and hopes you feel better soon.
Do not take any relationship recovery advice from Miguel!
First of all, Si, take relationship recovery advice from Miguel. Second, I wanted to say I'm sorry and I hope u feel better and all that because really, I am, but I have to say something else that may sound very insensitive but you need to hear it: how can u be head over heels in love (even as u are breaking up, and after)with these women (ie Mercedes, tu Linda) and still end up breaking up with them? Obviously you must have already thought about this and know much more about it than someone who reads your blog- but sometimes an outsiders opinion stating the obvious is something to consider- maybe you should fight for what you love.
Gee El, I am so sorry! I am not going to offer trite words of comfort, but I will do the same thing for you that I did for my son last week for a similar situation and will give you a big motherly hug (((HUG)))
:)Liz
:{
*hugs*
I really like your attitude about living thing to God or destiny...I also believe in that
I have heard before that sometimes love isn't enough... I have also read something that goes like this:
en las cosas del amor nadie manda, obedecen los dos
Hope everything comes out OK for you.
Sending you good vibes :)
I'm sorry, El G.
Yes, sometimes love is not enough. I am glad that you were able to gain from each day with tu Linda. Been where you are...and I know that with a moustache like yours you will survive.
Canadian fan
I am sorry that you are hurting. Blessings to you, and Linda too.
Sorry to hear your news...
Sometimes life is just suffering.
Everyone's a therapist, huh? Sorry anon, but you can't possibly know anything about El G from this blog, much less his relationship patterns. I am sorry, El G. :( I hope you feel better soon.
El Guapo- I'm so sorry to hear about this. I sure hope it wasn't because of the sewing machine...
Feel better soon. Abrazo.
Sorry to hear the bad news EG.
If it is meant to be, it will be.
I remember when I was younger, and people would tell me, "Brandy, timing is everything." I would get so upset. Because I thought that love was all you needed. If two people loved each other enough, wasn't that all that mattered? Wouldn't love be enough? Wouldn't love hold the roof up and be the answer to the problems, be all that they needed?
Turns out, in the end, those people who made me very angry were right. Turns out, no matter how much two people love each other, sometimes, it's not enough. Timing is everything. I hate that about relationships . . . I really do. And nothing any well-meaning commenter can say will make you feel better now. It just has to run its course.
The good news about love, though, is that like all other forms of pain, we forget how much losing it hurts. So that we will fall in love again . . . because without it, life really is devoid of meaning.
Leap and the path will appear.
Mucho amor,
Namaste
El Guapo, watch this and have a little laugh....
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sHzdsFiBbFc
Lo siento mucho...Only time will lessen the pain. Take care of yourself.
So sorry to hear this. I certainly have been in your shoes. It takes time, but you'll slowly get to feeling better.
Hang in there!
So sorry to hear this, EG. I wish I could say something that will comfort you, but it will take some time and then the pain will lesson. You'll never forget her- she may just fade into the background a little. Keep us posted on how you're doing.
Adding my sympathies to the pile. I know exactly what you mean about two people loving each other and yet, being unable to make it work.
Lo siento mucho, El Guapo. Tienes mi amor.
:( i'm sorry.
I read but don't usually comment...however I thought I'd drop you a line to say that I'm sorry to hear about you and your Linda. Good luck w/everything.
Go get Drunk and Make Bad Decisions, Agent 0
I'm sorry El Guapo! In more ways than you'll ever know. Every one deserves to love and be loved.
Dude, I am SERIOUSLY late for the party, and just catching up with several weeks of many people's blogs.
I'm sorry for the bad news.
I wonder if it was the sewing machine.
Excuse me. Now I'll go back to catching up.
exactly...how can two people love each other so much and yet it isn't the right thing at the right time? for me, it was the wrong thing at the right time and when he left me the summer turned into one long rainy night and i don't know how i survived it... but now he wants to come back, you know. and i don't know and i sure as hell hope God knows. he said, you don't love me like you loved me before and i said that's not true but it's true. how can i open my heart up again like that? it got stabbed once. now it's hiding. and it wasn't even like it got stabbed, because i knew too that it wasn't the right thing. it's so fucking fucked up. i wish you to look back one day and say, it was the right thing to go separate ways. i really hope that for all of us. shit.
Be strong, el guapo. He works in mysterious ways.
Cheer up soon..
Post a Comment
<< Home